No I’m not tumbling about “how much I hate you” I’m sitting here waiting for you to cool down because there’s a lot of shit around you and it’s hot out and your moms a bitch and your aunts a retard and your rooms a mess and all this shit and I just would rather it not exist. So I’m sitting here in my own little world where no one can hurt me and its nice and cool. Like stop fucking with me. I love you. I’ll do anything for you. But fucking quit it. I’m sorry you’re upset but don’t take it out on me. Just lemme be

Like why? I’m just trying to stay out of your way because apparently you don’t wanna be around me. So just let me be in the other room. I’d rather not add to this. It’s not fun being here. Like.

This isn’t fair. I’m sorry.

If you don’t want to be around me then don’t. I don’t want to add to this. I just want to spend some time with you and be happy. But it’s much too hot and there’s too many things happening to allow you to enjoy this time I guess. So I’ll get out of your way. Come back to me when you cool down I guess.

The smell of rain,
a glare on a window pane,
Wind chimes,
The birds rhymes,
The suns warmth,
Summer in the north

The dance of the smoke,
Closed eyes of a man who just awoke,
The sway of the trees,
The buzzes of the bees,

Observe,
Appreciate,
Learn,

Such vibrant colors,
Smell them,
Can you hear it?

Everything around us,
It has such potent emotion,
It shares with me a feeling,
A wave of happy times,

I can’t help but glance out,
I sit here and wonder,
Which of these really affects me,
Maybe the trees.

But what of the birds,
Their foreign words,
They speak,
I hear them every week

Dirty,
Pristine though,
Flirty,
Clean though,

Does it hit you?
Can you hear the song?
Are these words painting for you?
Is this stanza long enough?

Cut short,
Like everything in this world,
A tree.
Tall

Does it make sense yet?

No.
None of it does.

I see.

Create for yourself a world unknown and know it more than anything else

A dissonance.
Vibrations that interact in a seemingly unkind way.
Even the hum of the planes make a natural feeling for me.

The piano’s harmonies on my phone. Or the grass all around my home.
It doesn’t mean anything.

Unless you want it to.

Create

Your brain is much more powerful than you’ll ever believe.

I can’t shake this feeling. There’s something wrong inside me. I just can’t find that place I used to go in my head when I could create anything and just be happy with the entire world. There’s always something real and not as extravagant going on in my head. I used to be able to see worlds that you couldn’t even begin to imagine but my world is made of simple colors now. Not grey. But basic. I can’t find my magic. Things happen.

falling-into-a-dream:

Just let me in

I’m going to bed. I’m not in a bad mood. But getting further into my brain could lead downhill. So I’m gonna call it a night and rest with my good thoughts hoping for a good dream.